Many a feminist has argued that there are elements of prostitution built into ALL relationships (particularly hetero ones). I wouldn’t say what defines prostitution is being billed by the hour, but rather, the clear idea that you exchange money or other concrete remuneration for sexual labor.

Some sugar babies, I imagine, operate in a rather grey area where they date rich men and *expect* goods but don’t specify precisely what they may or may not get. Others actively seek out new daddies or mommies on social networking sites, just like you or I or some other sex worker might seek out new clients. Some might be very upfront with how much they expect to receive.

Certainly some self-identify as sex workers, and those that do should be welcome here.

But I think it’s important to recognize that grey area. What is the difference between a sex worker, and having someone buy a few drinks for you, or dinner for you, and then having that person assume you owe them a fuck? or at least oral?

What is the difference between a sex worker and a regular client, and a married couple who agrees that one partner will work outside the home while supporting the other? That’s exchanging clear, negotiated remuneration for sexual and emotional labor, isn’t it? (Let’s set aside the thorny question of child care for now.)

I’d argue that rights for sex workers are so important well, because we’re important, because we deserve to work freely and honestly and without shame, but ALSO: sex worker rights are SEXUAL RIGHTS FOR EVERYONE. Sex worker rights mean everyone has the freedom to determine what amount of paid sexual labor they want in their lives, and the understanding that this kind of negotiation is a normal part of sex.

And I’ll be getting off my soapbox now.